Working on that website...

How odd, when you look at your old website through new eyes.  It came from a time when my freelance work was my ONLY income, and almost everything I did had to be a way to earn my keep.  Some worked reasonably well, some did not and fell by the wayside (I don't make 18th C. style jewelry any more!)

So as the years passed I added more and more--new books, classes, images, blogs, galleries, links...and it became a huge, confusing mess that had very little to do with where I am now--or who I am now.

The new version will be vastly simpler, and a great deal will just go away.  It no longer applies.  I'll maintain the catalog (which will also be simpler since we don't do CDs any more) and the classes, at least the self-directed ones for the present, but the rest will be cleaner, more focused, and a good deal more personal and less business-oriented.  I'm a good deal older now, and I have less energy to waste.

There will be a focus on whimsy, fantasy, spirituality, creativity, nature...and gratitude.

For I am more than grateful I can turn my focus in those directions...

Shedding those old skins takes time and effort...I hope it will be worth it.  I plan to have fun, while I'm at it.

Choices, Time, and life just a bit out of control.

Well, all right, a LOT out of control. What IS this thing called control, and do I even want it?

Too many choices, too many opportunities, and an embarrassment of riches! 

I still feel the urge to journal and paint...

I love learning, and I am a sucker for books...but I have way, way more than I'll ever be able to read, on a wide variety of subjects. 

And then there are the online courses and classes and videos and groups and seminars and docu-series and workshops and webinars and membership programs and "summits" that capture my interest or curiosity...

I am currently in two membership programs and managed to pass on another one yesterday, a supporter of two Patreons with lots of wonderful offerings I am behind on, taking a class in February that requires preparation NOW (and it's fun and fascinating so of couse I make time!), finishing up a course I was behind in, and signed up for gnomonworkshops.com for a month or two to learn some new techniques for sculpting...

...and of course there are my own projects. The sewing, the character dolls, cooking, fermenting, herbalism, tinctures, journaling, painting, meditation, qi gong, tai chi, healing modalities...

This is Faeana Fawkes, who appeared in my imagination last summer and would NOT let go...

Who knew Faeana would bring so many more along with her?!  She was the result of a meditation or a shamanic journey after 3 years of foxes appearing in my life.

She was followed by a number of others, including these two soft-sculpture stuffed foxy girls, Joyful and her sister Studious. 

And then there's sewing for myself...

 
And Joseph...

He loves his warm, cozy short robe...

 

And eco-dyeing, one of the courses I'll be taking...there's a Daily Om one, too (and another Daily Om that Joseph would like to take together)...

I AM getting better at hitting delete delete delete DELETE on lists and offerings and courses, and even book temptations, and  I'm unsubscribing right, left, and center (how DID I get on so many mailing lists?!?), but even so...my poor brain feels like a bit of tasty snack food with a bunch of seagulls gathering to nibble it madly (and noisily!) to bits.  

Awake before five this morning trying to think WHICH of the many things to do...and here it is mid-morning and I've accomplished very little.  Paralyzed by choices...and by the internet...

I can't count the times I have aimed for more focus, stillness, attention, Presence...

"Be here now," Ram Dass entreated us, many years ago.  But where is here...?

Down by the River...happily sketching!

Finally, a cool morning and off to the river for some quality time...I had plenty of time to think and dream and just BE.  This is my small Noodler's Creaper pen with DeAtramentis Fog Grey ink...

Not really wild if you're wearing shoes, but the new rubber sandals allowed me to wade on the gravel and sharp rocks...I call it a compromised win!  I felt like a kid, though...

The light was magical...

Joseph heads off downriver to fish--I actually outlasted him for once.  He walked home, I drove when I was ready...

No idea how this got turned up on end...I like to think a particularly hungry raccoon was looking for shellfish...

Driftwood shapes...you'll recognizes these last two in my sketch!

Ripples catch my eye...

Green July peace...

Wilding and Re-wilding and my spur to creativity--Day 25

I am rereading my own book, A Naturalist's Cabin; Constructing a Dream--this really is a re-wilding, then.  I miss the person I once was, 20+ years ago, and barely know her, now.  So young, so full of energy...

I wonder if she is still here, longing to break the shell of years and life changes--but yes, I know she is, in the recognizing and noticing and delighting in nature close at hand.

Of necessity, I am somewhat less active; my knees object to uneven ground so exploring my 18 acres--which are virtually nothing but hills and bluffs and deep valleys--in such detail is mostly an exercise of memory.  (The book helps!)

In part, this is why we built the shed in the lot we own next door to our house, and why we let nature have her way there...the desire, the need for the wild and a place to nourish and observe it, accessible in all seasons.  And flat enough to walk every inch of it!  Observing the small changes, rejoicing in the magic...

Though right on the edge of town, the shed is nestled in a small wood that joins with a much larger forest. 

This is my view along the path...

The path itself is very nearly overgrown...shady and private-feeling, though in fact it acts as a shortcut between the houses up the hill and the old mom-and-pop grocery on the edge of town.

The shed's lot is growing up into volunteer wilderness, as well...

One of my favorite journal pages, just come across in my files...

Yesterday's super-fast squirrel sketch--Prismacolor colored pencil and wash.  These guys often inspire me to grab my quickest tools and materials.

...and yes, wishing the book were back in print...it's a wonderful reminder of a special time.

**UPDATE, one year later:  The book IS back in print, from Echo Point Books!  Life is good indeed!  Here's the page of my books...

Re-focusing...

Giving myself some room, taking my time, just being.  Just being.  Just BEING.

A constellation of tiny green stars on the path to the shed got my attention...I've always loved the small things...

...and I remembered to look up, and marvel at the miniature flowers on the climbing vine--I thought it was a variety of vinca, as it has covered the ground nearby with abandon.  Little mysteries!

A patent-leather umbrella hiding under the brushpile...I almost missed it.

Loving the slower pace and closer attention...